People tend to be private about their insecurities and humiliations. It’s a sad fact of life because it indicates that people aren’t comfortable showing vulnerability.
Unfortunately, people that don’t let others in on their fears are selling themselves seriously short when it comes to the potential of their growth. If you want to grow your social fluency and overcome any social anxiety you might possess, you need to let someone else in!
Release your fear of judgment and let someone know what you are anxious about, worried about, and want to accomplish but are too afraid of saying out loud. Tell them what your excuses are for not putting yourself out there socially, and let them be your support column. It will be a huge burden off your shoulders.
Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone help you overcome the mental blocks and fears you have and help you reach your full social potential? The main message here is to seek out a social accountability buddy.
Accountability buddies aren’t a new concept-they are simply people that know your circumstances, check in with you, and keep you on track. Personal trainers and life coaches are probably the most popular example of an accountability buddy, as you are literally forced by them to get into shape and keep forward progress to your goals. Social accountability buddies are the same except for social growth and goals. Accountability buddies keep you honest when you aren’t honest with yourself, and can ultimately push you over your challenges to new heights.
Sometimes, their biggest value is simply in keeping you from running away. We’ve gone over this earlier in the article, but I can never repeat this enough. There are always a million reasons to not do something, and very few are usually valid. If you have an accountability buddy, they aren’t going to accept your excuses and reasons.
They’ll push you to face your challenges… because that’s what is necessary to improve any trait. You need to live through those awkward social moments to become a better person.
They’ll force you to face the old saying, “No pain, no gain!”
Because they sometimes have to take a hard stance against your momentary happiness, accountability buddies work best when they aren’t your close friends or relatives… unless you’ve got some cold-hearted friends! They simply have to understand that any emotional distress you’re feeling is only in passing, is helpful for your personal growth that you need to experience, and sympathy for you has to take the backseat.
In other words, this person will understand full well that you need to go through a certain degree of pain and discomfort for you to change. They will push you back and really force you to do what you need to do.
Your accountability buddy’s job is to push you out of your comfort zone and keep pushing forward so you can experience the progress that you need to improve.
Of course, they won’t just push you off the plank to drown if you aren’t ready. They’ll jump right behind you into the deep end, and you can draw strength from their support and presence in your goals.
The reality is that an accountability buddy makes you grow up. They don’t allow you to cop out. They don’t allow you to give yourself excuses.
The best part of it all is that you’re both keeping each other in check. Because as much as your accountability partner helps you with your issues, you’re also helping him or her with his or her own issues as well.
You grow together.
